I Just Wanted to Call...

As I sit here trying to find the words that I want and need to say, I see how totally surreal the past eleven days have been for me.  The last words he said to me were, "I just had to call and tell you, Aunt Robin, I'm starting to work on Monday at Willow Lake Mine!  I needed to share this with you because I knew you would understand how much I have wanted this.  I have to go now because I have another call coming in, I love you and I will call you tomorrow."

There was and will be no tomorrow's for him.  He died before 3:30 a.m. that next morning. 

I have to take comfort in knowing he is in a far better place.  His demons died with him.  

Even though I saw him there in that tiny ER cubicle, even though in my pained heart I know he is gone,
my mind keeps playing tricks on me.  I still expect my phone to ring and to hear his voice saying, "Aunt Robin I just wanted to call and tell you how much you mean to me..."